Nursing student shares meaning of fatherhood
Fabian Wilson, 26, is a lover of children, a student nurse, husband and father to one-year-old Nathaniel.
Wilson told the Jamaica Observer that when he learnt he was going to become a father he was overwhelmed, excited, but at the same time he knew that a lot had to change as his new responsibility coupled with being a nursing student would be an easy feat.
“I always had a soft spot for children. So when I heard I was going to become a father words can’t explain. When he arrived it was a tear-shedding moment for me. I was overwhelmed with joy. I knew it was going to be difficult as it’s not easy paying university tuition and ensuring your child has everything he needs. I was nervous as I knew expenses were going to increase. However, I got reassurance that everything was going to be alright and the Lord will provide,” Wilson, a student at the Caribbean School of Nursing, Univeristy of Technology, Jamaica, said.
He shared his experience of fatherhood, in recognition of Father’s Day today, with the Sunday Observer.
How has the journey been thus far?
Everyday I learn something new, even though I was always in love with children and how delicate they are. It’s a bit scary at time, knowing that you are going to have to train up your child the right way. With everything that society is putting out there and we knowing the right thing and not wanting society to be involved in the raising of your children, it becomes difficult. However, so far the journey has been fun and everyone told me having a baby is going to be difficult and you will have sleepless nights, but I considered myself blessed as God didn’t give me a child that cries a lot.
How would you encourage other men to be the father figure their child needs?
Everything in life is a choice. You choose whether or not you want to take part or whether you don’t. You can choose to not own up to your responsibility or you can choose to really push through and be the man that society is lacking. When you look around on men in society today a lot are not becoming that person their children can look up to. When things don’t work out you hear, “a fi her pickni, she can do anything she want do, me nuh care’. We need to get away from that. Be who we are called to be irrespective of what is thrown at us.
Did you want a girl or boy?
Honestly I wanted a boy. My reason is that I saw it as God giving me an opportunity to raise a male child in this world in the way a male child is suppose to be raised. Growing up, my father was never the type to sit me down and explain things to me. I had to see the mistakes he made and make the decision within me not to make the same mistakes. When I found out it was a boy I just bowed my head in the room and prayed. I oftentimes say I have an understanding of how a male is supposed to be raised. I believe if we truly take responsibility for being a man and decide to make good out of a situation, we will do it. I am going to make a good man out of this baby boy.
What are you looking forward to?
My hope is that when I die, he will have something to look at and say ‘yes, my father showed me what it is like for a man to be a man in spite of what the world is saying’. I am looking forward to him being that agent of change.
Most memorable moment?
His first word was daddy. Not da da, but daddy. On my way to church with him and as plain as day he said daddy. My wife was not pleased, she was jealous, but I was over the moon.
What words do you want to leave with fathers?
Look on everything going on in society and choose to be the individual who will stand. No matter the criticisms, make the decision to be the difference. It is full time now men get back to where they are still in the household. There are some things a man or father can teach a child that a mother can’t. We need to stop hearing the stories of men not pulling their weight. It is time to stand.
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